Out of Bounds

Examples of things you should say during a cell phone conversation at a semi-crowded coffee house:

- “I’m at a semi-crowded coffee house. Let me step outside and call you back.”

Examples of things you should not say during a cell phone conversation at a semi-crowded coffee house*:

* All real

- “I won at poker last night, baby. Baby. I won at poker last night… at poker… last night… at the casino. Poker. Poker. I was playing poker at the casino and I won.”

- “What we need is one of those portable iPods.”

- “Maybe we should keep the garlic in a different place. Because it’s messy. It’s messy. Maybe by the refrigerator. Because it’s so messy.”

- “Everyone here is riding scooters”*

*Total lie

- “How much did the chopsticks cost? How much? I’m not going to let you spend money anymore.”